Saturday, October 11, 2008

My dreams of making millions off CHILD STAR have been shattered...

First of all, I have to commemorate this occasion, for the first time in 5 and half weeks Sofia was put down in her bassinet half asleep and stayed their asleep, without screaming for 2 hours, hence the reason I can write this, though I am pushing my luck and will have to keep it short so I can get some sleep before she wakes up again.

Alright, I know most moms say their kids are the cutest in the world, but we all know that is not true, there are some ugly  kids out there, and when it comes to newborns most of them look like a mix between MINI ME and BENNY HILL. That being said,my daughter is the cutest baby in the world...I swear. So like all good moms I immediately had dreams of putting her to work as soon as possible, you know, get me some cash for all the work I just went through. Well as I was searching online for good AGENTS I glanced over at her on my lap and noticed something on her face, it looked like ACNE. Of course the first thing I did was look up baby rash on line, and then after convincing myself that she had flesh eating bacteria I called the doctor.
He let me know that it was normal and would go away, so having heard that of course I took her to the hospital, I mean come on, he obviously had no idea what he was talking about, I need a specific diagnosis and even better yet, some meds to go with it. The doctor at the hospital said pretty much the same thing, but he had an extra couple of initials in his title being a specialist and all so I felt a little better. When it comes to the baby I have a three prong approach to medical advice; ONLINE chat forums, family doctor, emergency room. I have never worried about someone in my life, to the point where I am perfectly okay with being unreasonable and borderline psychotic when it comes to her well-being.

Well now that I can't count on her modeling career I might look into some aerobics program like those Chinese Olympics kids were enrolled in at birth and see how much cash I can get that way....I wonder how old you have to be to work for Cirque to Soleil????


No comments: